Funny jokes to share, Not really funnny...

Food laughs & humor
From Harper's Magazine:

Amount of pizza eaten each day in U.S. (acres): 75

Found on the seal of a bag of bagels:

NEW
IMPROVED
Made the old
fashioned way

Sign in a restaurant:

"We reserve the right to serve refuse to anyone."

Heard on a radio station.

What did the female mushroom say about the male mushroom?

"He's a real fun guy [fungi]."

Q: Ever wonder about people who pay $2 for a bottle of Evian water?

A: Just spell "Evian" backwards!

You got me with the naive.

K...

hahahs not bad. at least got effort to post xD. A few more months or weeks and this forum might be full of posts and hopefully more active members.

Advertise lah :3

kk fine xD *msn time*

NOWAI!
*Forum time*

Let me tell u a joke(may not find it funny)
A man escapes from prison where he has been for 15 years. He breaks into a house to look for money and guns and finds a young couple in bed.

He orders the guy out of bed and ties him to a chair, while tying the girl to the bed he gets on top of her, kisses her neck, then gets up and goes into the bathroom. While he's in there, the husband tells his wife:

"Listen, this guy's an escaped convict, look at his clothes! He probably spent lots of time in jail and hasn't seen a woman in years. I saw how he kissed your neck." If he wants sex, don't resist, don't complain, do whatever he tells you. Satisfy him no matter how much he nauseates you. This guy is probably very dangerous. If he gets angry, he'll kill us. Be strong, honey. I love you."

To which his wife responds: "He wasn't kissing my neck. He wwas whispering in my ear. He told me he was gay, thought you were cute, and asked me if we had any vaseline. I told him it was in the bathroom. Be strong honey. I love you too!!"

Wall of text,lazy to read.
:-P

Jus read damn funny

Wait for me to read lo.

There is another funny one
The bride tells her husband, "Honey, you know I'm a virgin and I don't know
anything about sex. Can you explain it to me first?"

"OK, Sweetheart. Putting it simply, we will call your private place 'the
prison' and call my private thing 'the prisoner'. So what we do is: put the
prisoner in the prison.

And then they made love for the first time.

Afterwards, the guy is lying face up on the bed, smiling with satisfaction.

Nudging him, his bride giggles, "Honey the prisoner seems to have escaped."

Turning on his side, he smiles. "Then we will have to re-imprison him."

After the second time they spent, the guy reaches for his cigarettes but
the girl, thoroughly enjoying the new experience of making love, gives him
a suggestive smile, "Honey, the prisoner is out again!"

The man rises to the occasion, but with the unsteady legs of a recently
born foal.

Afterwards, he lays back on the bed, totally exhausted.

She nudges him and says, "Honey, the prisoner escaped again."

Limply turning his head, He YELLS at her, "Hey, its not a life sentence,
OKAY!

This one more long but funny and sicker

Another wall of text,lazy again.
Winson,read your pm.

lol aqil ur 2nd one real sick xD

Winson not aqil refer to the RL name thread for people names.

oh ya i forgot. i sped through the thread i forgot to see the RL hahahs xD * paiseh*

Slap yourself for that!

*cant touch me* xD.

I got the adam touching gloves

Omg how did u managed to steal my rare gloves!!! i bet u bought it on....eBay! xD

*Sings eBay song*

I GOT A JOKE.(just made it up though)
Hungry?Have a sneaker *kick*

HAHA nice 1 aldric!!

Isn't it supposed to be
*Throws Shoe(Sneakers)*